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Saturday, September 23, 2006

Stupid Flick

Happy Birthday To Sharon~!~!~!


Was down boozing @ my work place!

With Anthony!

Then headed down to catch a flick at Cineleisure!



Damn stupid flick!!

Friday, September 22, 2006

Club Momo

Happy Birthday Kelis~!!!

Went down to Club Momo after work...
With my colleauge...
It had been ages since i last visit here...

I got a shock when i was there...
Saw some one very familiar there...
I could not believe my eyes...

I saw Elaine!!!!!!!

Damn!

She went back to work @ momo!

Basket!

Go back and work also never tell people!

Haizzz!

But Songster wasn't back!
Kinda miss him actually..

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Drank!

Happy Birthday Kai Qi~!!!!

Well...
Head down to Colour Zone @ Boat Quay after work...
Damn...
The Chivas was damn cheap!

But I was drunk!
I vomit when i was @ the void deck of my house...
Due to the mixture of too much alcohol....

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Stupid Uniform

Argh~!

Damn~!~

Now we got to wear uniform went we work!!

Yucks!!!!

So Orbit~~~

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Last Explanation

The wife came home early to find her husband making love to a beautiful, sexy young woman.

"You unfaithful and disrespectful jerk! What are you doing?

How dare you do this to me the faithful wife, the mother of your children!

I'm leaving this house and I want a divorce!"

The husband, replied, "Wait! Wait a minute! Before you leave, at least listen to what happened."

"It'll be the last thing I will hear from you so make it fast, you cheating creep."

While driving home this young lady asked for a ride. I saw her so defenceless that I went ahead and allowed her into my car.

I noticed she was very thin, not well dressed and dirty. She mentioned she had not eaten for three days.

Out of compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night that you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll gain more weight!

When I served them to her, the poor young thing, practically inhaled them.

Since she was dirty I asked her if she'd like to bathe.

While she was showering, I noticed her clothes were worn-out and full of holes, so I threw them away.

Since she needed clothes, I gave her the pair of jeans that you no longer wear because they're too tight on you.

After she dressed, I walked the young woman to the door where she turned around and with tears of gratitude streaming down her cheeks, she asked me....

"Sir, do you have anything else your wife doesn't use?"

Monday, September 18, 2006

Just For Laugh!

1) One Singh was enjoying the sun at the beach in America. A lady came and asked him, " Are you relaxing?" Singh answered, "No, I am Banta Singh". Another guy came and asked the him the same question. Singh answered, "No No Me Banta Singh!" Third one came and asked him the same question again. Singh was totally annoyed and decided to shift his place. While walking he saw another Singh soaking in the sun. He went up to him and asked, "Are you Relaxing?" The other Singh was a lot more educated and answered, "Yes, I am relaxing." The Singh slapped him on his face and said, "Stupid, idiot. Everyone is looking for you and you are sitting over here!!"

(2) A Singh died and went to heaven.When he got to the pearly gate Saint Peter told him that new rules were in effect due to the advances in education on earth. In order to gain admittance a prospective heavenly soul, he must answer two questions: 1. Name two days of the week that begin with "T". 2. How many seconds are in a year? The Singh thought for a few minutes and answered... 1. The two days of the week that begin with "T" are Today & Tomorrow. 2. There are 12 seconds in a year. Saint Peter said, "OK, I'll buy the Today and Tomorrow answer, even though it's not the answer I expected. But how did you get 12 seconds in a year?" The Singh replied, "Well, January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, etc..." Saint Peter lets him in without another word.

(3) Jasmeet Kaur caught her husband Santa Singh searching high and low all around his living room. Jasmeet : "What are you searching?" Santa :"Hidden cameras!" Jasmeet:"And what makes you think that there are hidden cameras here?" Santa : "That guy on TV knows exactly what I am doing. Why every few minutes he keeps saying 'You are watching the Star World Channel'. How does he know that?"

(4) Having lost his donkey a Singh, got down to his knees and started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for?" The Singh replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I wasn't riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too."

(5) Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He then removes his turban and throws it away as well. His shirt, pant, socks and watch follow suit. The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on. "Oye, I am only following the instructions here"! It says here "Answer the following questions in brief".

(6) Two Singhs were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying like hell. So the other asked, "Why are you crying?" The first one said, "I came here for blood test" Second one asked, "So? Are you afraid?" First one replied, "No, not that. During the blood test they cut my finger" Hearing this, the second one started crying. The first one was astonished and asked the other, "Why are you crying?" The other replied, "I have come for my urine test."

(7) A Singh goes to a hotel and eats heartily. After eating he goes to wash hands but starts washing the basin instead. The manager comes running and asks him, "Mr. Singh, what are you doing?" To this the man replies,"Oye, see the board here ---"Wash Basin".

Sunday, September 17, 2006

A Very Touching Story

When You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms

On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car
Stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry
her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and
shy.. I was a strong and happy bridegroom. This was the scene ten years ago.

The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid;
I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were
steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ebb. She was a
civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost
at the same time.

Our kid was studying in a boarding school.
Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was
More likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.

Dew came into my life.

It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from
behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This
was the apartment I bought for her.

Dew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her
words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my
wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.
Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my
wife.. But I couldn't help doing so.

I moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture,

O.K.?

I've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy,
because I had promised to do it together with her. At the moment, the
idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something
impossible to me.

However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No
Matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.
Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing
dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon.
Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer,
visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.

One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce,
what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word.
Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from
her. I couldn't imagine how she would react once she got to know I was
serious.

When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all
The staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide
Something while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently
Smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.

Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.?

Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.
When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something
To tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly.

Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious
topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me
softly, why? I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made
her angry.. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a
man!

That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she
wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could
hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated
that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my
heart.

The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a
Stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.
Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected
To see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce
which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and
clearer.

Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw
Her writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I
found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.

She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from
me, but I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and
in the month's time we must live as normal a life as possible. Her reason
was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and
she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken.

She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning,
Do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day?
This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to
me.

I nodded and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she
continued...

So, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on
the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must
carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning.
I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage romantically.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and
thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face
the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me
feel uncomfortable.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention
Was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So
When I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son
Clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words
brought me a sense of pain.

From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten metres with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I
nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She
went to wait for a bus, I drove to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my
chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse.I realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.

On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vague.

On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc.

I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this. I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I smiled.

But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again,I felt a sense of pain.. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.

Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute.

I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.

On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old.

I held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life lacked intimacy.

I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened The door.

I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious.

She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever.. She said. I moved her hand off my head.

Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more.

Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.

When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old.